If you have ever lost a pet, then you know how difficult it can be. We lost our Icelandic Sheepdog, Chloe, in September of 2008. It was the first day of Middle school for T. C and R were home with me when I realized that the gate was open and Chloe had left the yard. This had happened before and she never strayed far so I wasn't overly concerned. I called for her a few times. Then the phone rang; it was my husband. He received a phone call from my mother-in-law who was on her way to work when she saw Chloe in the street. My mother-in-law tried to get to her but didn't make it in time. Chloe was hit by a car and her little 25 pound body could not handle the impact. We had her cremated and still have her ashes. We thought about spreading the ashes somewhere, but decided that Chloe would rather be home with us, her family. Chloe was only 5.
Chloe's death was more difficult than I ever imagined it would be. T had a rough few days. C had several meltdowns and could not grasp the reality of the situation. R looked for Chloe constantly. I was most surprised at my own reaction; I cried a lot for at least a week. Chloe has been gone for over six months and my children still talk about her EVERY day. We recently got a puppy and the children often talk about how they wish that the puppy, Kelly, and Chloe could be friends.
Anyway, we did a few things to try to make the loss of our beloved pet easier:
1. We placed photos of Chloe in frames around the house so that we can never forget her;
2. We read a lot of books about losing a pet. Our favorite book about losing a dog is Dog Heaven by Cynthia Rylant - this is a fantastic book with wonderful illustrations that helps children feel good about what happens to their dog after death. I think it is comforting (even to adults) to believe that God is taking care of our pet and that she is having fun in Heaven. We still read this book regularly, especially when C and R start to miss Chloe. There is also a version of this book called Cat Heaven.
3. C (age 4) dictated stories about Chloe and I wrote them for him. He then illustrated his stories. I am going to put them together in a book for him; and
4. I am not afraid to talk about death with my children. My husband and I weren't going to tell the little ones the truth in the beginning, but we realized that they would never be able to move on if they didn't know what happened. Also, we thought it was important for them to grieve.
We love our new puppy, Kelly, but she is definitely not a replacement for Chloe. She is simply a new member of our family. Chloe will always be in our hearts.